It's been a difficult week for Brad, Karsten and me. Actually a difficult month. We can testify to the fact that time does not heal all wounds. Anyone who has ever lost a child knows that life is never the same again. God is our Healer and Sustainer. He has chosen this journey for us. We may limp or crawl at times and we trust that He is going to get us through. This life on earth is a journey, for we are just passing through until we arrive to our final destination...our home in heaven.
For those of you who are new to our blog, I would like to share with you the story that God has written for our lives about our second son, Kyler Braden Evans.
On the morning of March 22, 2004, at 38 weeks pregnant, I went into labor. Brad and I took Karsten over to Dean and Elaine's house then we headed to the hospital. Although in some pain, I was anxious to hold and see my baby. After arriving there and getting prepared, when the nurse checked Kyler's heartbeat, she said it was low (I forget, it was somewhere in the 80's). They called my doctor and he performed an emergency c-section. Since I was still under anesthesia, I didn't get to see Kyler when he came out. However, while the Lord was with Brad, he had to witness things unimaginable that any father should not have to do. Kyler was not breathing and the doctors and nurses did everything they could in the 45 minutes to try to revive him. On the day Kyler was ready to be born into this world, he went straight into the arms of Jesus, our Savior.
We had found out a few weeks later that I have a genetic blood clotting disorder called factor V leiden. With that, a pregnant woman has an 8-10 times greater chance of having a blood clot. When I went into labor, a blood clot had formed in the placenta which had cut off oxygen and blood flow in the cord.
Eight hours had passed until we got to hold Kyler and take pictures. That explains why Kyler looks the way he does in the pictures. I am so thankful for the pictures and for nurses Bethney and Carol. We didn't realize it right away, but I was also sick with HELLP syndrome, therefore I was in the hospital for a week.
Kyler Braden Evans
"All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be."
Psalm 139:16
"Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail."
Lamentations 3:22
"I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with
the glory that will be revealed in us." Romans 8:18
"Jesus said, Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them,for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these." Matthew 19:14
Five years! Our little boy would be 5 years old today. Five is like a milestone age, a fun age. Brad and I both agreed that this has probably been the most difficult age to miss. Don't misinterpret that, they've all been hard and not a day goes by that we don't think of and miss Kyler. This Fall he would have been starting Kindergarten and since I would've been his teacher it hurts even more. The older Karsten gets, the more he misses his little brother. He has also been sad about one of his close friends moving away and just this week Karsten told me, "It's just not fair. My brother died and lives in heaven and now my best friend is moving." He continued on with, "Why did you and Daddy get to keep your brothers here on earth and I didn't?" I was crushed. I don't know why God took Kyler. But I do know that we serve a God who loves us. Please pray for Karsten. If I focused all the time on the things that I don't understand, I wouldn't want to get out of bed each day.
"Naked I came from my mother's womb,
and naked I will depart.
The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away;
blessed be the name of the LORD."
Job 1:21
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